Prospective homeschooling parents have to face fears, doubts, and myths that prevent them from making the decision to homeschool their children. This article is an attempt to dispel myths, dispel fears, and disqualify the excuses against homeschooling that prevent many parents from having the incredible experience of homeschooling their families … (yes, not just the kids, parents are homeschooled too!)
1. I don’t get along with my children / My children have bad attitudes / My children don’t listen to me.
This, for me, is one of the best reasons to homeschool. Instead of running away from discipline issues that need to be addressed, loving parents should take advantage of opportunities to teach and train their children to be respectful and obedient. They need to learn to reach the hearts of their children, not only to apply various methods of behavior modification and punishment, but also to build heart-to-heart relationships with their children.
Ignoring a problem or waiting for a teacher to take care of it does not show love or commitment to children. They will test their limits and need parents to care enough to set and enforce limits. Homeschooling provides many opportunities for building relationships between parents and children.
2. I don’t have a good education / I can’t teach subjects like math and science
Research has shown that the education level of homeschooling parents is not a determining factor in homeschooling success. Even parents who dropped out of high school have successfully homeschooled their children throughout high school. Parents who did not have a good school career can often fill in the ‘gaps’ in their own education as they move through various concepts with their children.
Homeschooling curricula are designed for use by untrained parents, professionals, and students seeking self-study. In most cases, clear instructions are given, parenting guides and solutions are provided. Some curricula even provide instructional DVDs where a teacher teaches the new concepts for the benefit of both the parents and the student.
As a last resort, homeschoolers can also do what school children do if they struggle with a subject: they can opt for private lessons.
3. I can’t afford it.
With all the curriculum options and options available plus the free resources available on the Internet, there is no reason for this excuse. Most homeschooling families survive on a single income and still provide their children with a good quality education.
In the worst case, you can limit yourself to spending the same amount that it would cost for your children to attend school, without the extras like school clothes, lunch money, contributions to fundraising and other school-related expenses. .
Since most of your money will be spent on books and materials that can be reused with your younger siblings, you can get great value for your money.
4. My kids LOVE being with their friends
If your children prefer to be with their friends than with their family, they may already have developed an unhealthy peer dependency. This may not seem like a problem at the preschool or elementary school level, but wait until they are in their teens!
As an alternative, homeschooling enables children to establish good relationships with both their parents and their siblings. When their identities are deeply rooted in their families and they have good family values, children are better able to develop healthy friendships outside the home.
Homeschooling allows parents to choose the social interactions their children experience. Parents can keep them away from negative peer pressure or bad influences until children are old enough to gradually expose themselves to them and mature enough to make good decisions and build good relationships.
Homeschoolers don’t just stay home. They also socialize, but not during school hours!
Research has also shown that, in general, home schoolers have better social skills across a wider range of age groups than school-going children, whose social interactions are largely confined to their own group. old.
5. I have no patience
When I started homeschooling, I read somewhere that you only have patience if you need it!
The same goes for other character qualities that homeschooling parents need, such as perseverance, humility, self-sacrifice, compassion, diligence, etc.
It is through homeschooling that our characters are formed, molded and mature and we equip ourselves to do what we are called to do.
6. I am afraid of failing.
I often tell my children that “Courage is doing what we have to do, EVEN WHEN WE ARE AFRAID.”
It amazes me how many parents are afraid of spoiling their children’s education, but they don’t seem to be afraid that some teacher will spoil it even better!
When you see how many children suffer for various reasons in the school system, it is even more surprising that parents are willing to entrust their precious blessings to strangers for 6 hours a day or more!
As a parent, you love your children like no teacher ever will, you care about their best interests, and you are able to give them a personalized education, tailored to their individual needs.
Unless you are not committed to successful homeschooling and dealing with parenting and discipline issues that may arise, there is no reason why you shouldn’t do a job equal to or better than a paid professional.
Now, I am not saying that any parent can be a school teacher; no, I think one needs special training to teach a class of 35 or more children who are not their own in a school situation … but I do think they committed parents can do a good job homeschooling their own .
7. Will I face it? I’m already stressed out.
Many outsiders see homeschooling only as an added responsibility – the burden of their children’s education. However, to give you a different perspective, homeschooling is a lifestyle that brings a lot of flexibility to the family’s day-to-day life. This could be just what helps a stressed parent better cope with the demands of the family.
Since everyone is together, without rushing in different directions, life is generally simplified. Children are at home and can also be taught to help around the house.
Sometimes parents may initially need to stop certain outside activities or commitments, such as additional church programs, sports, or hobbies. However, this is not always the case and many homeschoolers are just as, if not more, involved in their communities than non homeschooling families.
Sometimes these activities just need to be rescheduled to fit the homeschooling lifestyle.
Learning to adapt and putting family first is usually a good thing. I know of far too many people whose children are treated as second-rate citizens for the so-called good of the community, so that parents can find approval from their own peer group for their good deeds and commitments!
8. We have such a nice teacher / school.
There are certainly some very nice teachers and schools with good results and good reputations. However, do the teacher or the school’s values match your family’s values? Will the good teacher always be the one who teaches your child?
Often times, a school is legally required to teach a curriculum that may conflict with its beliefs. No education is neutral. If you don’t know what your children are being taught, perhaps you should find out the underlying belief system.
No matter how kind the teacher or school is, only YOU have an intimate love relationship with your child and are ultimately responsible for your child’s education, whether you delegate that responsibility to a school or not.
9. I need more stimulation / I can’t stay home / I love my job.
As career workers, many of us initially find our identity in our work, satisfaction in the approval of our coworkers, boss, or just the paycheck at the end of the month.
Choosing to stay home as a wife and mother requires a change in mindset and accepting that at the end of many days and months there is no tangible reward. You realize that raising well-educated, trusting, and confident children is one of the greatest accomplishments one can strive for. For many of us, it is obedience to a call from God.
Although stimulation may be of a different kind than work, homeschooling can be very stimulating for parents, as it offers them the opportunity to learn and explore topics of interest together with their children. It gives you time to enjoy educational trips, tours, excursions, cooperatives, crafts, hobbies, sports, and even business opportunities from home.
(Many homeschooling parents, like myself, have website-based businesses that earn them good income and can work at their own pace! See links below.)
10. My parents, in-laws, friends, neighbors or church, etc. will not pass.
For whatever reason, we all like to have the approval of others, especially those whom we respect and with whom we have intimate relationships. However, if you and your spouse agree that homeschooling is best for your children, you must have the guts to stand up for your convictions.
For many non-homeschoolers, homeschooling is a strange concept and people don’t understand why they are NOT just doing what they are doing and sending their children to school.
Sometimes people feel that by choosing homeschooling, you are silently judging their education choice and rating it second best, so they attack your choice because attack is their best defense.
Ultimately, you are responsible for your children, not your family and peers … and a good response is to tell others that you feel that their choice is the best for YOUR family, but realize that it may not be the same for other families. You don’t even have to explain your reasons!
Many homeschoolers have had to face criticism and skepticism from outsiders, but in the end, “the proof has been in the pudding,” as they say. Many times, after a few years, others have seen the good fruit of a homeschooling family and have earned the respect and support that they lacked in the beginning.